This is really a neat site. I am printing out the workbook for dd and me to work through. Not sure I can get her to go along with it, but it will at least give me topics to bring up and ideas to try. Thanks!
I was always very naturally very thin and strikingly pretty as is my daughter now. This continued thru my 20's and 30's until my divorce caused me to age tremendously and gain 50 lbs. Women were always distrustful and wary of me and competative with me until I aged so much. Then, miraculously, it became very easy to make close, supportive friends. I now know to coach my daughter to expect that some women will be jealous of her looks and not to take it personally as I did. The lack of attention from men is a godsend as now I am approachable with the women. But 40 years was a long time to put my life on hold. Women, if you think of yourself as "not a beauty" please dont keep beautiful, thin women at arms length. With this cult of youth and beauty- pretty, young girls are EQUALLY harmed emotionally, through no fault of their own. I do very regularly stress to my daughter to cultivate her female freindships and I make sure she does. I wish my mom had been there for me to explain this but she wasn't, with her mental illnesses and nobody thought to take me under their wing as women think that those who have beauty have everything. So, plese don't be jealous of the woman who is prettier than you. The attention she gets from men may actually be isolating her and may be unwanted. I know I never really dated anyway but people assumed I had a very active social life and passed me by.
I'm so sorry you experienced that. It can work both ways, though. Physically attractive people are often thought of, in general, as possessing more attractive personal qualities, when people are judging merely by surface appearance.
I think the Dove campaign can speak to both groups, though. We should not be so quick to judge another by physical appearance. Instead, we should practice virtues of kindness toward all.
This is really a neat site. I am printing out the workbook for dd and me to work through. Not sure I can get her to go along with it, but it will at least give me topics to bring up and ideas to try. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteI actually thought of your dd when I saw that there were things for mom's and daughters to do together.
ReplyDeleteWow that was unbelievable!!
ReplyDeleteIsn't it?!
ReplyDeleteI was always very naturally very thin and strikingly pretty as is my daughter now. This continued thru my 20's and 30's until my divorce caused me to age tremendously and gain 50 lbs. Women were always distrustful and wary of me and competative with me until I aged so much. Then, miraculously, it became very easy to make close, supportive friends. I now know to coach my daughter to expect that some women will be jealous of her looks and not to take it personally as I did. The lack of attention from men is a godsend as now I am approachable with the women. But 40 years was a long time to put my life on hold. Women, if you think of yourself as "not a beauty" please dont keep beautiful, thin women at arms length. With this cult of youth and beauty- pretty, young girls are EQUALLY harmed emotionally, through no fault of their own. I do very regularly stress to my daughter to cultivate her female freindships and I make sure she does. I wish my mom had been there for me to explain this but she wasn't, with her mental illnesses and nobody thought to take me under their wing as women think that those who have beauty have everything. So, plese don't be jealous of the woman who is prettier than you. The attention she gets from men may actually be isolating her and may be unwanted. I know I never really dated anyway but people assumed I had a very active social life and passed me by.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you experienced that. It can work both ways, though. Physically attractive people are often thought of, in general, as possessing more attractive personal qualities, when people are judging merely by surface appearance.
ReplyDeleteI think the Dove campaign can speak to both groups, though. We should not be so quick to judge another by physical appearance. Instead, we should practice virtues of kindness toward all.