Saturday, July 8, 2006

Adventures with the Over Seventies

Went out unexpectedly the other day with 4 "older" members of my family. We met at the home of the aunt who lived nearest the restaurant where we would be eating. I offered to help out with the driving, since all were getting up in years.

So, does the 45 year old drive? Noooooo....
Does the 73 year old (who is still quite functional) drive? No......
Does the 79 year old drive? Nooooo......
The Eighty-frickin' two year old drives a car the size of a small limo!!!!!!!!

We get to the traffic light and the 79 year old asks the driver, "Do you come this way often?"

"No."

Woah!! The worry meters go up to the red on that one!

We get to the parking lot and she pulls up to the wrong restaurant. She tries to park about 3cm away from another car in a space that I still maintain was not a parking space at all.

The 73 year old who lives out of town has to direct her to the right place. Then the 82 year old remembers she has handicapped tags and can park up front near the restaurant, which, given the average age of the attendees, is a good thing.

Afterwards, the 82 year old is curious about this other restaurant, and keeps looking over towards that end of the parking lot WHILE POINTING THE STEERING WHEEL IN ANOTHER DIRECTION AND PUSHING THE GAS...albeit, ever so slowly.

Instead of going out the obvious exit, she seems to be inching towards the exit with a pot hole big enough to swallow her humongous car. At this point, the 73 year old offers to drive but is told by a shocked 82 year old, "I can drive!"

Well apparently not.

I guess its true what they say--Growing old is not for sissies!

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